O What A Night

Another year, another Prom! 

This was the fourth annual prom that CB's school has held and the amazing prom committee never fails to disappoint, nor does the community who helps support and sponsor this event. 

Unlike past years, I have very few photos this time. She is always uncooperative with the camera but this year she seemed excessively so.  Her disdain for the camera coupled with the fact that I was too rushed to get any photos at the house before we left, made the evening a bit less documented than usual.  

I had a lot of photos of the top of CB's head.  She just hates to look up.

She was not at all interested in being outside, just like last year, which was a shame because it was actually a gorgeous, warm evening with a picturesque backdrop.   I remembered what my husband always says to the girls: "Im taking pictures with my heart." That's what I have... lots of heart pictures.

She was much happier sitting down at our table and ripping apart the center pieces and her corsage.   

My ex-husband brought his girlfriend who has come before and she is just lovely and sweet.  As she sat there with CB's father and I, we were mistaken for his girlfriend's parents.  Yes, our table-mates assumed that he and I - obviously CB's parents- were also his younger girl friend's parents too!  At first I was all like "Ha ha, my ex just got mistaken as his date's FATHER! Bwaaahaaahaaa" 
But moments later I was all like, 

Oh, snap - major buzz kill that I look old enough to be her mother!

As my seven year old daughter says "Awwww-kward!!"

But funny. Definitely funny, in an "I've lost all sense of pride anyway" sort of way. 

It was a good laugh.
At my expense. So, whatever. 

 CB and her peeps

The best part of the night, for me, is when the DJ gets going and the dance floor fills up with kids, teachers and family - everyone boogying down. I wish I had a video of it.  I'd play it every morning to make me smile right from the heart.  It makes my year.

Even CB, a non-dancer, got out there once and jumped about. 

I love this prom.  The best night of the year for me and CB.

Read about our past prom nights HERE and HERE if you're new or just want to take a trip down memory lane!

tHERsDay

Today I'll get up at 6 am. I'll get everyone a hot breakfast.
I'll bring the trash and recycles to the corner.
I'll bring Rella to the park with friends.
I'll dye my grays, I'll feel my age.
I'll clean the house after Rella boards the afternoon bus, really clean it not just pick it up.
I'll run out to the grocery store for the fourth time this week
then hit the drycleaner and return overdue library books.
After school and homework and snacks I'll bring the kids to art class, back and forth for multiple sessions between 5 and 7 pm.
I'll change some diapers, I'll make some dinner, I'll give some baths, I'll shave CB's legs.
I might go grab a drink tonight with friends if Dr. Fabulous makes it home before 9:00,
but I might not.
If not, I'll finish reading Gone, Girl with a glass of white wine.

I'll do all of these things today and
I'll go to bed excited because tomorrow will be much more of the same but will
end with something special.
Tomorrow is prom.
CB and I are going to Prom! 
Maybe I should shave my legs too.

Weekend Wrap-Up: Mother's Day

Hope all you Mommas out there had an awesome Mother's Day!  Ours was pretty standard fare... it wasn't awesome, it wasn't a bust.  It was fine.  It was pretty much like most weekends 'round here except in the midst of soccer practices, double-date dinner plans, Dr Fabulous working almost all Saturday afternoon, family visits, and all the general what-not 

I got a very cute slew of handmade gifts from the girls and a very appreciated gift card to a spa.   

And I got my annual Mother's Day photo.  After Pink was born I asked Dr Fabulous to take a picture of me and my girls on Mother's Day each year. They are never anything frame-able but they are my memories and documentation of how they grow. 

The early ones are on my old computer that crashed years ago and so there goes my idea of a bloggy trip down memory lane.  

Here's this year's photo.  CB is pissed.  That's a mid-yell "I'm pissed off" face that passes as maybe a happy laugh. It was better than some of the other faces she was making in the 27 other pictures.  You can see her sisters are totally "done" with posing. 

It's certainly better than this one

and definitely better than when she's not here at all.

The thing I've learned about Mother's Day AND photos is you can't expect too much from either. You just gotta roll with it and appreciate everything that isn't perfect because that is always what makes the heart smile and the memories unique.  

Muver's Day Tea

Rella's Preschool had a cute Mother's Day Tea

or how she referred to it: "Muver's Day Tea."

As they get older, there is less and less of these types of activities at the school.  They work harder, have fewer class parties, and Moms come in less and less frequently. Pink is practically a full-fledged, independent adult in the third grade.  I don't even think they HAVE parties anymore. 

Tink, in first grade, is on borrowed time.  

I'm gobbling it up with the Rella-Roo.  This is it for me.  For us.  The time to savor is dwindling.

We'll move on the the next stages - sweet in their own way, but nothing can ever replace this.

Happy Mother's Day to all you 'Muvers.'

tHERsDay

Thursday is the back and forth shuttling to and from art class. 

CB gets dragged along, interrupting her afternoon nap.  We drop off two girls at 5, go home, pick up at 6, and drop the third off, go home, then last pick up at 7.  

Notice the phone book.  It is highly important to drag around a big fat phone book at all times on these trips.

You never know when you might need to call someone.  

Weekend Wrap Up

This weekend the family got our FIRST PET.  Their first, last, and only pet I might add.  The girls won goldfish at our Township Day's festivities.

Every year our town has a big day starting with a 5K race (I passed on this one), a parade down Main Street, then an all day festival with crafters, vendors, food, games, some rides, laser tag, live music, lip synching contests, and ends with fireworks.  It was probably the most beautiful weather you could conjure for a day like this.

We had to miss the parade, which devastated poor Pink because she had the opportunity to walk in it with her 'Girls on the Glow' group which is part of the Women's Tri Club.  With Dr. Fabulous coaching Tink's soccer that morning at the exact same time, it was just too daunting a task to drag CB out, park, ride the shuttle to the staging area for the parade, then wait around for 30-45 minutes on the street BEFORE the parade even started, then watch the parade, and find Pink at the end in the crowds.  Without the husband's extra hands, managing CB and Rella was proving to be a logistical puzzle with no good solution.

CB's special needs make our family stronger, happier, more loving but make no mistake - it sometimes keeps the other girls from doing many activities.  But ask Pink if she'd trade it for the world?  Nope - she wouldn't.  She loves her big sis. She recovered.

I was feeling so guilty about the whole parade thing, like maybe I should have just braved it all and gone to that parade with CB in tow and probably it would have worked out fine. But then, after all 6 of us went to the township day?  I realized I made a good choice staying home that morning without Dr. Fabulous there to help.  CB went ballistic at the festival.  It was that kind of crowd-taking-one-step-back-and-staring-at-you kind of ballistic.  It was the worst behavior I've seen from her in a long while - screaming, flailing, throwing rocks, hitting... just lookin' all sorts of wild and half-crazed.  

Dr. Fabulous took her home and I stayed with the three little girls.  I hate it when we have to separate like that.  It's the sucky side of being a non-typical family with a special child.  It weighs heavy on our hearts, but I guess every family has to make sacrifices in some way - a crabby toddler who needs a nap, a surly teen giving you attitude, someone coming down with the stomach flu.  This is just our situation, our sacrifice. You gotta roll with it.    

So, I guess that's why I had a moment of weakness and allowed for these fish to be brought home.

Dr Fabulous was not present for the winning of the goldfish, so he was quite shocked when we brought them home.  "We are a no-pet family" he said a bit shocked.  This is true - I concur 100%.  We have no pets, we want no pets, and the mere thought of bringing any creature into this house from a hermit crab to a dog is veto'ed without a nanosecond of consideration. Taking care of one more living creature is just not happening here.  Some days I feel like I can barely keep the human creatures in my home alive!  But, fish are fish.  You don't walk them, they don't shed, they aren't expensive. Ya know, how hard can it be?

Well, obviously harder than I thought.  The fish arrived home on Saturday and were named B.B., Candy, and Lia.  They swam in three little make-shift goldfish bowls. We were careful not to over feed them, but I did not want to invest in an aquarium and all sorts of other stuff.  I thought I remembered just having a goldfish in a bowl with unfiltered water when I was a preteen and that thing lived for months!  

Well, by Monday afternoon, Candy was dead.  By Tuesday morning, Lia joined her.  Only Pink's goldfish is left and there is this somber air around here. We're all just waiting for her to croak. I'm actually kinda sad and stressed about it, not relieved. I feel like a horrible fish killer.

  I don't know what we're doing wrong.  Probably lots of things.  

Obviously, don't ask us to pet sit. 

Or plant sit.  We kill those too. 

Good luck B.B.  

tHERsDay: These Things That Are True

These things are true: The sky was cloudless and blue and the weather perfect.  We spent the morning at a playgroup in the park.  After an afternoon at the dermatologist, the girls all arrived home and we hung outside with my neighbor while the girls played.

These things are true: I took the girls to their art class, and back, to art class and back, to art class and back.  Yes, it's that many times. My essay appeared in Something Special Magazine today, page 8 (yes there are two typos and yes, that sucks).

These things are true: I have a glass of wine next to me and Dr. Fabulous just returned home at almost 10:00 pm.

These things are also true:  It was a difficult morning getting CB up and on the bus. She was uncooperative and I had to lug and lift 110 pounds of resistant teen, dodging spit balls. It was a crazy two hours surrounding that art class - After dropping two girls off for their art session, CB got into her poopy diaper while sitting for 5 seconds in the car while I talked to the art teacher at the doorway only inches away.  Her face, hand and clothes were covered.  We rushed home and I changed and cleaned her then rushed back out to pick up the two girls and drop off Pink for her art session.  We went home, and there was diarrhea number two and a bloody nose on the rug ten minutes before we had to return to pick up Pink.  Dinner was not eaten until almost 8:00 pm, bedtime was rushed, Tink had a tearful meltdown, the house was a wreck.

It was a beautiful day.  I am blessed. I love my life. Yet, these things are also true: Life, as we know it under this roof, is not easy.  Life long care of someone you love is never easy.  Life long care. Unless one lives the true extent of these words everyday, it is difficult to understand the impact.

Yet somehow, the many things that are both true and also true live together in this weird sort of harmony; bizarrely making sense.

And I am happy. I choose happy, which will always be true and also true.

************

My essay is on page 8, in the 'Mom 2 Mom' section. Click below on the image to read: